Smart Ways of making Time as A Mother-Why & How?

Who does not like to have a ‘ME’ time, where you are the boss at doing your own interesting activities or pursuing your dream. If you could make time as a busy parent, this totally feels like you are on cloud nine.

But as a mother especially as a new mother, it can feel like you are never alone and always overburdened. Even if you have thought of borrowing some time for your personal care and activities, it feels next to impossible. It’s all because we are too busy in understanding the sudden change introduced in our life and learning ways of parenting.

Have you given a thought why it feels like you do not have free time or you cannot make it?

Let’s figure out together… Sit on a comfy chair, clear your mind and give it a shot…

Here are few reasons, why?

1. You are Too Exhausted

Even before your child wakes up you start preparing yourself with the child’s need and it continues till late night. This never ending needs leaves you exhausted. Even when you are not doing anything, you are constantly attentive to: where is your baby, what they are doing, are they safe. This is especially true when your baby starts crawling or walking, you are always thinking about their safety.

All this is mentally tiring and time-consuming.

 

2. You are striving to become Perfect

No one is perfect. This is true in all aspects of life. Every mother and child has their own way of special bonding. No one can rate you as being perfect or imperfect mother, there is no parameter that defines perfection. You just need to know and feel good about what you are doing as a mother for your child. As long as you both are happy, healthy and easy-to-go everything is nice and perfect.

Do not over-push yourself in finding a way of perfection. You are a mother and your baby is blessed about it.

 

3. Digital World Consumes Time

Today, you have planned of doing some chorus after putting your baby to sleep. But you find yourself scrolling social media feeds and you spent an hour doing this, you realize it when your baby starts to cry an hour later.

In today’s world smartphones are blessing but when we have limited time, we should not overlook utilizing it.

 

4. Busy is not a Badge of Honor

Busy-ness is a trap that has been glorified in our society especially for a mother. People always feels proud in saying that they do not have time to plan for other activities. You can always make endless to-do list while parenting but you need draw a line between what is required and what not.

When your child is properly fed and is in a happy mood, you can always ask house care or baby-sitters to accompany your child. Believe me, this way you can always find some time for yourself every day.

Now I feel, you can think of what to eliminate from your regular routine to make time only for yourself.

If you still have not figured out how to do it.

 

Here are some tips, how?

1. Do not Stress

Stop worrying about how to achieve all the task at one go. Everything takes its own time and it will happen gradually. You do not have to push yourself, it is too easy to feel like you are failing at everything even the best mom are facing burnout. Learn to stay calm even at worst situation. This can be achieved by taking a step back from the situation, breathe, clear your mind and think for a solution.

Suppose the baby is crying for your attention and you are in mid of preparing meal for a special occasion without any help around. What to do in this situation? Instead of panicking you go ahead to hold your baby and cuddle. Find if something is bothering and if everything looks well, you both do a small activity together that makes your child happy. Once your baby is calm you can resume your preparation.

 

2. Organize Ahead

When you child is awake, it is difficult to focus on some other task when they keep asking for your attention. Wake up before your baby wakes up. This way you can manage you clutter around the house without any intervention.

When things are organized in the house, it becomes easy to clear the mind and helps in planning the upcoming activities without any distraction.

If you organize your kids room in the morning, it will help you to procure the things when needed without delay. Also, you will make it easy for other person to grab the stuff who is helping you with the baby.

 

3. Schedule your Outings or Vacation Weeks Ahead

If you have any upcoming vacation, plan ahead so that you have enough room to pack your baby’s need and then there will no last minute clutters. This way you won’t be overburdened and tired. You will also have time for modification in case of emergency.

You can also prepare your child for the upcoming activity during vacation otherwise you will end up with calming fussy baby without enjoying the vacation.

 

4. Make to-do-lists and Prioritize

It is always helpful when you have list of activities along with priorities marked and plan it week ahead. With this you can plan a day with few important activities, few less important and some free time for yourself.

If you are planning it ahead, you can always modify it without compromising it with your leisure time.

Suppose you have a car-wash appointment which got cancelled and you have to opt for another day, you can replace your activity of another day to the cancelled appointment. This way you will utilize your precious time without last minute hustle.

 

5. Set More Realistic Expectation

A house with baby needs to lower the expectations when it did not had baby and the housekeeping habits needs to be re-set.

Earlier, you might be cleaning your gardens regularly or cleaning your windows regularly. But now, this can wait and need focus more on your activities with child. Sometimes, clean laundry is more important than having a folded laundry. Not all your cereals and kitchen stuffs has to be emptied in a container, you can save a bit of your time by using as it is.

If it is difficult to set housekeeping activities the other way, then try to hire help periodically for maintaining house.

 

6. Leave Some Tasks Undone

If you have not completed all the task of your day from to-do-lists, then you do not have to push yourself beyond. It is fine if you cannot follow all, as a parent your child’s need are more important. Always remember to stay flexible being a parent because not every day is going to be the same or followed as per your scheduled tasks.

DO not overdo the task, plan the leftovers for other days and give priority to self-care.

 

7. Reduce the Clutter

Less stuffs means less maintenance. Build the habit of giving away the stuffs which are not in use at your house. Or else you will spend all your time picking up and cleaning up things around the house.

Minimizing the stuffs will also help to reduce the anxiety of the members living in the house. More space and more organized corners will bring calmness and positivity. Also, decluttering your wardrobe can simplify your life.

Do not waste your time and energy in maintaining the stuffs forever, instead try to invest your time in doing some productive activities that interests you or in your self-care routine.

 

8. Utilize Co-Parenting

When it’s your first child, it is overwhelming emotion where both the partners simultaneously involve in child care routine. They love to follow their first smile, first word, first step and everything that goes by with the baby.

However, after relishing these beautiful moments, plan to take turn while taking care of baby.

You can make it happen either by dividing the day as first half of the day for mama and later half of the day for papa. Or you both can take up different activities of child like feeding, bathing for mama and stories, play for papa or vice versa.

As per your comfort and availability, partners can take up turn and leave room for other.

 

9. Ask For ‘Help’

Never hesitate or feel ashamed of asking help, do not worry of being judged by other if you ask for help. A good mom always ask for help when needed for the betterment of the family. There is no such thing as ‘Perfect Mother’ and if you are trying to achieve it then you are burning yourself in becoming someone invisible.

Whether you are single-mom, working-mom, stay at home mom, everyone needs help and we need to learn how to ask for help or to hire for help.

Ask your partner to help you even if he is working full-time. You can also ask your family, neighbour, friend, co-workers whom you can trust. You can also look for a baby-sitter or day-care.

 

You may struggle finding time for yourself because you have put yourself at the bottom of the priority list unknowingly. Now is the time to indulge yourself into self-care which is essential for good parenting.

Treat time like it’s more valuable than money. You can earn money, not time.

You have to make it for yourself… So let’s begin the journey…